Welcome To Chillville, Son(s)

The Comedy Sessions

 

 

itsonlike.wav

 

 

Check out http://thewingguys.tripod.com for fall off the bone goodness

 

   

Chillville 2004 Photos. Tamed.

Oh Wreck

Chillville 2005 Check it out son

 

  

New words for the dictionary:

1. JoeDog, JoeDogg, JoeDoggy, UJoeDoggy

2. LeBabe, NonLeBabe, NonLeBabes

3. IfNortel

4. NotXray, NotXrayIt

5. Baten

6. Sans Sharde

7. Ripsaur

8. Tornsaur

9. Gonzor

10. Wastor

11. Wastoid

12. Rimming male bears and pineapples

13. Good in the back

 

 

Oh Hollywood

 We know all your secrets

The Sace Monologues, by Mr. Johnshone, February 3/2003

Today shall go on record as THE, Heretofore Anon, Including but not Discluding of, WORST SACE DAY EVER. I want you to rub your naked ass on your seat right now, get up, turn around, sniff the cushion and multiply by 1,000. It was an embarassed-to-get-up off your seat for fear of social annihilation Sace Day. Smell the leather seats in your Cadillac sans air conditioning in New Delhi. Flies are coming.
 
It began this morning around 10:30 am. Work had been unusually uncozy. I bent down to pick up a reel from a lower shelf when I opened the crack of Mordor and unleashed Sauron the Sace. I turned red as panic crept up my spine and turned my face flush red. I looked left, then right, and performed a standard finger-to-ass-zone sace-check. Result: positive for MIND BLOWING SACE. Imagine the smell of a leather coat stuffed in a locker for two years with cinnamon gum in the pocket. YES IT WAS (and is) THAT BAD. I ran over to smell my chair to confirm what my fingers already knew: yes, there was a sace cloud the size of Hiroshima emanating from my asshole. Why, you ask? Who knows why. The Sace moves in mysterious ways.
 
The stress kept building as I had to interact with more people, who were asking me to do very Sace-inducing things, like build new reels and research commercials. I was sure that I was leaving a Sace trail like a comet through the Solar System, wafting in and out of other people's offices. I just tried to clench up and subdue the Sace, but Sauron is a foe who is not easily contained. The more I clenched, the worse the Sace got. Things hit a peak when I realised that all this Sace Containment was moving my bowls in mysterious ways. Oh Lordy...picture the RETALIATION from a Palestinian suicide-bombing Ariel Sharon's family home. Break out the bulldozers.
 
I ran downstairs and took a really fat shit. This was satisfying, however, it would leave me with even worse sace. I stayed in my office for the rest of the day, until home time, whence it was a fucking tight-assed evening, spent sitting with asshole in cushion. I pity that couch. I pity my office chair. I pity those who had to endure the wrath of my poisonous tail. I look forward to a thorough ass-washing ceremony tomorrow morning. Cleanse the spirit and purge the demon, in our homes, and schools, and Sauron-Sace Factories. Make sure you ram your soap bar up inside that mothafucka. Bathe the walls, Barnes, Bathe the FUCKIN' Walls.
 
Heretofore Anon Within Literally,
 
MJ


 

 

 

 

More comedy

GONE


 

 

Hereto within therefore lies within the current, but not existing within the preminence of the concurrent daily members of Chillville:

Matt, James, Mike

With concurrent members: Steph, Pat, Martina.

And the rest: Ian, Andrew, AJ, Tash, etc.

 

Biographies of the members of Chillville

Old Pictures of Chillville

 

Click here to learn the language of sace

Click here for possible Chillville band/album/song titles

Click here for a brief history of Chillville

Click here for some comedical names

Ponies Mains


Justin - city chillvillian (non-cottage)

 

COTTAGE TRIPS:

(trip number, date, and who attended)

#28: November 28-30, 2008. (James, Matt, Mike, Steph, Pat, Samantha)

Simple sessions. Goony Goo Goo. Ice is very thin.

 

#27: May 24 long weekend, 2008. (James, Matt, Steph, Pat, Martina, Andrew, Carson, and others)

Rockstar sessions.

 

#26: August 30 - September 3, 2007. (James, Matt, Steph, James friends (5 in total) Pat, Martina, Andrew, and others)

First Chillville trip in a long time. Crohn's sessions. Look forward to regular Chillville again sometime soon. James is a rockstar now.

 

#25: February 3-5, 2006. (James, Matt, Mike)

Manville. Ice 12 inches thick.

 

#24: December 29-January 1, 2005/2006. (James, Matt, Steph)

The Steph sessions
Ice 6-9 inches thick

 

#23: July 29-31, 2005. (James, Matt, Jen)

Birthday sessions, hangover sons, new girl for J.

 

#22: July 1-3, 2005. (James, Matt, Melissa, Chris, Dan, Kristen)

Pure comedy sessions, best trip to date, naked swimming and highway walking, plenty of debauch but no hangovers sons

 

#21: May 19-23, 2005. (James, Matt, Mike)

May 19, 20 - Chillville
May 20, 21 - Kiosk, Algonquin Park
May 22, 23 - Rosseau

May 24, 2005 - two cottages + camping in Algonquin = Pure debauch, great times, great comedy sons

#20: January 28-30, 2005. (James, Matt, Mike)

20th Anniversary Trip - too short though

Ice 12 inches thick. Comedy + sick sessions. Big Wreck visited

#19: May 22-24, 2004. (James, Matt, AJ, Melissa, Dan + Kristen and Ruby)

I'm from Holland, ishn't that wierd?

#18: February 20 - 22, 2004. (James, Matt, Mike)

Ice >18 inches thick. The Comedy Sessions Part 2. Coma coma coma Comeau

#17: January 1 - 4, 2004. (James, Matt, Mike)

Ice 6 inches thick. The Comedy Sessions.

#16: May 18 - 20, 2003. (James, Matt, Dan)

#15: January 17 - 19, 2003. (James, Matt, Mike)

Ice 8 inches thick

#14: August 30 - September 1, 2002. (James, Matt, Mike)

#13: June 28 - July 1, 2002. (James, Matt, Brownwyn + friend, Peter UltimateAss + Maki)

#12: June 14 - 16, 2002. (James, Matt, Mike)

#11: June 5 - 7, 2002. (James, Matt)

Painting Chillville the first blue colour session

#10: April 26 - 28, 2002. (James, Matt)

No ice. 3.5 hour hike session

#9: February 18 - 20, 2002. (James, Matt)

Ice 11 inches thick

#8: December 28 - January 1, 2001/2002. (James, Matt, Mike, Andrew, Tash)

BEST (and longest) TRIP EVER

Ice 3 inches thick, but 3 feet of snow.

The story: 1 foot of snow fell saturday night, 2 more on sunday night. This forced us to be trapped at the cottage without beer and food for one day, because the snow plow didn't come. Life is hard. Play hard. Orno.

#7: June 30 - July 1, 2001. (James, Matt, Mike, Ian)

Short trip due to Robertson's Benz sucking ass, and due to death in Gardiner's family.

#6: February 17 - 19, 2001. (James, Matt)

Ice 14 inches thick. Big Wreck the tree has been visited

#5: December 29 - January 1, 2000/2001. (James, Matt, Mike, Andrew)

Ice 6-8 inches thick

#4: September 7 - 9, 2000. (James, Matt)

#3: May 19 - 21, 2000. (James, Matt)

#2: March 3 - 5, 2000. (James, Matt)

#1: December 30 - January 1, 1999/2000 (James, Matt, Mike, Ian)

(The thickness of the ice is mentioned because, during the winter months, Chillville has no running water. Thus, we need to break through the ice to produce water for washing and cooking and toilet flushing. NOT for drinking).